Sept 2, 2001 Train Ride to Pathankot and Arrival in McLeodganj and Gaining My Freedom at Last!
Well, I am just after my first nite in McLeod (Dharamsala) and also my first day as a "free agent" and I am feeling just wonderful.
So, let's get back to the train ride here, my first ride on an Indian sleeper train. We traveled 2-tier AC (air conditioned) and for me it was just perfect.
The train is a very pleasant experience...you are given bedding which is very clean including a pillow and you just curl up and go to sleep for the nite. The bathrooms are also quite clean with mirrors etc. Certainly nicer than those on a plane for example! I think next time I will try 1st class just for the experience to see how the really rich live...it is a lot more expensive but still cheap for any westerner.
Anyway, we arrived in a town called Pathankot about 3 1/2 hours drive from Dharamsala. We easily found a taxi (I am becoming a real pro at this stuff) and the road started out very nice but as we got higher into the hills and closer to Dharamsala, the roads became narrower, and more pock marked all the time, and at some point the road just basically disappeared and I haven't the faintest idea how these cars continue the steep, winding, hairpin curve climb up these mountains...eventually we got into McLeod which looks fascinating. I haven't really explored yet but will begin to today.
We got to our hotel which was highly recommended...but could be a few years ago it was nice but it is a real dump now...Hotel Tibet...terrible, including the food.
I immediately asked for separarate rooms as my companion and I had discussed and this is where the whole thing just blew up. For some reason she had convinced herself that I was bluffing...anyway...to make a long story short...you already know that we have parted company, but there was some very not nice words sent my way at some point. I really didn't care...it only proved that I was right in my decision, and the only mistake I made was probably not doing it sooner when I felt like it in Leh a couple of weeks ago...but I felt bad for her and with good reason.
After getting set up in my room I went to lay down for awhile before going out to explore, and there was a knock on my door....I opened it and A. was standing there all smiles as if nothing had happened and do I want to sit and talk...I said there is nothing to talk about and to please leave me alone to rest...maybe I would see her later....she began to cry and I simply closed the door and went to sleep..
A little while later the door knocked again, and I didn't answer, sure it was A. again, but then someone called "Hey Jane...it's Dyannne!"...This is a lady I had been in touch with from Israel who is the American kibbutz lady and she had come to look for me to take me exploring and just meet personally.
She was really my type of lady...very much like me in many ways, and so different from A. ...she also only travels alone but always meets up with people when she has the need. She was very pleased to meet me and we first went to eat and then she took me up to her guesthouse which was perfect and where I will be moving in a couple of hours. We sat and talked for about 3 hours and she understood completely about A. and even predicted what was to come and that it had happened to her several times in the past and I should just stick to my decision no matter what!
Well, after leaving her I went down to the best internet place town and started writing the letters you received yesterday and also chatting with my Indian friend on-line...who had met A. and asked me how I was doing etc. Little did I know that A. had slipped quietly in and was actually standing behind me reading everything I wrote without saying a word. I didn'[t write anything cruel or anything but certainly not pleasant things for someone to read about themselves, even if true. When I was all finished...she tapped me on the shoulder and asked if I was ready to sit and talk with her!
Well, you can just imagine my feeling of shock and discomfort, but I said "no problem...let's go eat dinner at a cute place I discovered!" (I forgot to mention to her that one of the nicest things about the restaurent is that it is "no smoking!!) Anyway, we sat down to talk and what happened next was realy difficult for me but I turned the switch in my head and realized that she was just a lost, frightened, spoiled child and from then on had no problem coping. She first revealed to me that she had never intended to come to India alone and only when she realized that I would take care of everything and take care of her as well, did she decide to come. She also mentioned that her parents would not have given her permission to go if she had saied she was alone!!! My God...the woman is 46 years old!!!! anyway, she cired, pleaded (dyanne had predicted all this don't forget) said she would have to go home immediately, said she didn't know how to do anything by herself, said she was scared, overwhelmed, pampered, needy...you name it...she even asked me to have pity on her and continue takiing her along with me.
What I finally did was...she came up to my room...gave her all options avilable including phone numbers, e-mails and addresses of all people she could talk to to help make any arragnements she may want to...gave her all options of leaving, staying, whatever, and finally at 10 PM (!) I sent her to her room to sleep.
I haven't seen her yet today but whatever she decides she is now on her own. I told her the time had come for her to realize her own true inner strengths and stopped being a spoiled little girl. How she manages to counsel others I have no idea! She actually was very thankful for the things I said to her and said it was the first time anyone had actually spoken with her in this way. I told her I have lots of experience...she even said at one point she purposely acted the way she did to make me feel guilty (which of course it didn't) and said she didn't understand why it didn't work...it works on everyone else...I reminded her that I raised 6 children and am immune to such childish behaviour!
OK...so now...I slept, a littly uncomfortably..the bed is not good..hope the bed in the guest house is better. I ate breakfast and now am here writing to you..
I will be moving to my new "home" in 1 hour and have a feeling that I will be staying here for a long time. they have cooking classes, yoga, ayuverda, buddhism lectures, meditation, dance classes...just tons to do and just beautiful mountains to walk around in just for contact with nature which I know I will do alot of. I have also discovered some book stores where you can buy used books and resell them and buy others and I have already started reading. Haven't read "just novels" in ages as I had no time and I am really enjoying...first one I picked was a robin cook called Contagion which I hadn't read yet
...also can now really enjoy my music alone in the room and even pampered myself with some luscious pastries yesterday in bed before I went to sleep. I think I will finally start gaining back weight here. I will also get some natural medicince to get rid of this annoying cough I still have.
By the way...it rains here all the time. Not all day, but sporadically...but it is warm rain like in NY in the summer and the weather is actually very pleasant. My first purchase yesterday was an umbrella which I have already used and it is really good I have these nice walking shoes with me...all muddy...I am having a BALL!
that's it fornow....will write again maybe later on today when I get settled in.
So, let's get back to the train ride here, my first ride on an Indian sleeper train. We traveled 2-tier AC (air conditioned) and for me it was just perfect.
The train is a very pleasant experience...you are given bedding which is very clean including a pillow and you just curl up and go to sleep for the nite. The bathrooms are also quite clean with mirrors etc. Certainly nicer than those on a plane for example! I think next time I will try 1st class just for the experience to see how the really rich live...it is a lot more expensive but still cheap for any westerner.
Anyway, we arrived in a town called Pathankot about 3 1/2 hours drive from Dharamsala. We easily found a taxi (I am becoming a real pro at this stuff) and the road started out very nice but as we got higher into the hills and closer to Dharamsala, the roads became narrower, and more pock marked all the time, and at some point the road just basically disappeared and I haven't the faintest idea how these cars continue the steep, winding, hairpin curve climb up these mountains...eventually we got into McLeod which looks fascinating. I haven't really explored yet but will begin to today.
We got to our hotel which was highly recommended...but could be a few years ago it was nice but it is a real dump now...Hotel Tibet...terrible, including the food.
I immediately asked for separarate rooms as my companion and I had discussed and this is where the whole thing just blew up. For some reason she had convinced herself that I was bluffing...anyway...to make a long story short...you already know that we have parted company, but there was some very not nice words sent my way at some point. I really didn't care...it only proved that I was right in my decision, and the only mistake I made was probably not doing it sooner when I felt like it in Leh a couple of weeks ago...but I felt bad for her and with good reason.
After getting set up in my room I went to lay down for awhile before going out to explore, and there was a knock on my door....I opened it and A. was standing there all smiles as if nothing had happened and do I want to sit and talk...I said there is nothing to talk about and to please leave me alone to rest...maybe I would see her later....she began to cry and I simply closed the door and went to sleep..
A little while later the door knocked again, and I didn't answer, sure it was A. again, but then someone called "Hey Jane...it's Dyannne!"...This is a lady I had been in touch with from Israel who is the American kibbutz lady and she had come to look for me to take me exploring and just meet personally.
She was really my type of lady...very much like me in many ways, and so different from A. ...she also only travels alone but always meets up with people when she has the need. She was very pleased to meet me and we first went to eat and then she took me up to her guesthouse which was perfect and where I will be moving in a couple of hours. We sat and talked for about 3 hours and she understood completely about A. and even predicted what was to come and that it had happened to her several times in the past and I should just stick to my decision no matter what!
Well, after leaving her I went down to the best internet place town and started writing the letters you received yesterday and also chatting with my Indian friend on-line...who had met A. and asked me how I was doing etc. Little did I know that A. had slipped quietly in and was actually standing behind me reading everything I wrote without saying a word. I didn'[t write anything cruel or anything but certainly not pleasant things for someone to read about themselves, even if true. When I was all finished...she tapped me on the shoulder and asked if I was ready to sit and talk with her!
Well, you can just imagine my feeling of shock and discomfort, but I said "no problem...let's go eat dinner at a cute place I discovered!" (I forgot to mention to her that one of the nicest things about the restaurent is that it is "no smoking!!) Anyway, we sat down to talk and what happened next was realy difficult for me but I turned the switch in my head and realized that she was just a lost, frightened, spoiled child and from then on had no problem coping. She first revealed to me that she had never intended to come to India alone and only when she realized that I would take care of everything and take care of her as well, did she decide to come. She also mentioned that her parents would not have given her permission to go if she had saied she was alone!!! My God...the woman is 46 years old!!!! anyway, she cired, pleaded (dyanne had predicted all this don't forget) said she would have to go home immediately, said she didn't know how to do anything by herself, said she was scared, overwhelmed, pampered, needy...you name it...she even asked me to have pity on her and continue takiing her along with me.
What I finally did was...she came up to my room...gave her all options avilable including phone numbers, e-mails and addresses of all people she could talk to to help make any arragnements she may want to...gave her all options of leaving, staying, whatever, and finally at 10 PM (!) I sent her to her room to sleep.
I haven't seen her yet today but whatever she decides she is now on her own. I told her the time had come for her to realize her own true inner strengths and stopped being a spoiled little girl. How she manages to counsel others I have no idea! She actually was very thankful for the things I said to her and said it was the first time anyone had actually spoken with her in this way. I told her I have lots of experience...she even said at one point she purposely acted the way she did to make me feel guilty (which of course it didn't) and said she didn't understand why it didn't work...it works on everyone else...I reminded her that I raised 6 children and am immune to such childish behaviour!
OK...so now...I slept, a littly uncomfortably..the bed is not good..hope the bed in the guest house is better. I ate breakfast and now am here writing to you..
I will be moving to my new "home" in 1 hour and have a feeling that I will be staying here for a long time. they have cooking classes, yoga, ayuverda, buddhism lectures, meditation, dance classes...just tons to do and just beautiful mountains to walk around in just for contact with nature which I know I will do alot of. I have also discovered some book stores where you can buy used books and resell them and buy others and I have already started reading. Haven't read "just novels" in ages as I had no time and I am really enjoying...first one I picked was a robin cook called Contagion which I hadn't read yet
...also can now really enjoy my music alone in the room and even pampered myself with some luscious pastries yesterday in bed before I went to sleep. I think I will finally start gaining back weight here. I will also get some natural medicince to get rid of this annoying cough I still have.
By the way...it rains here all the time. Not all day, but sporadically...but it is warm rain like in NY in the summer and the weather is actually very pleasant. My first purchase yesterday was an umbrella which I have already used and it is really good I have these nice walking shoes with me...all muddy...I am having a BALL!
that's it fornow....will write again maybe later on today when I get settled in.
posted by Jane @ 1:59 PM
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