November 3-5, 2004
Friday, November 5th!
"The absurdity of a life that may well end before one understands it, does not relieve one of the duty to live it through as honestly and generously as possible" - The Snow Leopard
Today is Friday and I am feeling just about completely well. My test yesterday came back normal (which I was pretty sure of) and I guess whatever I had was just a virus. I am not completely "myself" but feeling happy and at peace and that is what is important. Avik is getting more difficult with each day...he really has taken a serious dislike to me - it is so obvious by the way he looks at me and replies to my questions - but that is HIS problem and not mine. I see him very little and be as nice as I can when we are together and that's that.
Haven't written in a couple of days again and much to tell, so will begin slowly and see how far I get.
Wednesday, my first day really up and around again, I felt an urgent need to walk in the mountains but did not have the energy to walk UP the mountain. so took a rickshaw up to Dharamkot and then just had to walk ON the mountain instead of UP it. It was quite lovely, except for my encounter with Anil who is still persisiting...but was actually quite understanding of my situation and didin't push the issue beyond a request to requite his undying love for me...another guy who just wants a good lay!
Did I write by the way about Avik's sleep talking? Last night , or close to morning when I was watching the sunrise as I do every day, he called out in his sleep "She's such a bitch" or something close to it. Well, I decided to raise the question of why he thought I was a bitch, and what he thought I'd done so horrible to him to cause him to think I am such a terrible person. Bottom line is, after a long interesting converstaion which he denied having the following day, he admitted that basically he never really liked me at all as a person, and just wanted my body!! He really is a very weird person...Won't dwell on the subject, but it was all quite surreal to say the least. His dislike for me grows from day to day as I've mentioned, and just hope I can make a quick a break as possible with him, but that all depends on how soon I can move all my stuff out of his house.
I know that he is already back ont he internet looking for someone else, and have this feeling that I should be able to warn other women about him, but don't really know how to do it and don't think it would be a very clever idea anyway...I have to just get past it as the channeling said and move forward...other women will have to look out for themsleves and hopefully they will be wiser than I was.
I am now sitting in Trek and Dine in Dharamkot eating a quiet lunch after my walk on the mountain. The place is dead quiet...not even one motorcycle outside...it is so peaceful here...I don't even mind the INdian music in the background...more fitting than the usual Hebrew or rock which is played here usually.
Watching an Indian guy get a haricut right here ont he terrace by a "travelling barber" who then massaged his head for a full 10 minutes with oil and is now working on his hands and arms. Looks absoulutely fantastic. WOW! Now he is doing his feet and legs! Amazing!
On my walks recently, even though short, I've seen tons of butterflies and all kinds of new birds that I've never noticed here. Flying South perhaps? don't know. Maybe some of you might know what they are and tell me....one is small and black with a white diamond marking on its head and a red tail. Quite colorful and beautiful
The other is a large light blue one with black markings and a very very long tail.
I've also received a small job offer to teach reiki in pardes chana when I get back and although certainly not anything I could live from, it is a good starting place and could even continue if I get a regular job...
Funny thing happened today while walking in town which has never happened to me before. I was approached by an elderly monk, not a begger or anything, a monk, who started to ask me for something but had no idea what he was saying "hali" or something. If it had been a beggar, I would just have walked off, but a monk, who knows,,,,maybe something important. When I didn't understand, he grabbedme by the hand (I have NEVER felt any adult with such soft skin on his hand...only babies feel like that...apparently never done anything since very young but be a monk!)...and then I realized he was pulling me over to the closest food shop! What did he want??? You won't believe it! He wanted a package ot tumeric! Which I bought for him for 10 rupees...but this was really funny!
But I had a lovely walk and then walked down back to town, sat at nick's looking at the view I so love with hot apple tea and toast and butter.
Had a nice return to the room and we all just ordered food from Ashish and then Abdellah wanted a movie for the first time in almost 2 weeks. Avik didn't want to join us so we saw They Shoot Horses Don't they...I'd never seen it and it was quite original and very well acted. Enjoyed it.
Yesterday Thursday we got up early, and went with Kokila to her farmhouse. This has got to be one of the most fabulous places I've seen for a real get away from it all vacation. They have this piece of land right on a river, where they have built a house for themselves and containing an additional 5 rooms for guest eachw ith private bath. They have fresh fish fromt he river, free range chickens, organic vegetable garden trees with papaya, mango, banana, guava, nuts...they get fresh grain from the village and grind it themselves in a mill...and when you sit there, the ONLY sound you hear is the sound of the rushing of the waters fo the river over the stones...people buy CD's to get this sound so they can relax or meditate, but here, that is the only sound you hear. It is hypnotically relaxing. Kokila cooked us a wonderful lunch, actually the best meal I've ever eaten in India, and then took abdellah and myself out to see the village and walk around. Avik didn't want to come but preferred to have a drink with her husband and then take a nap. It is a place I can see myself spending a week or even longer in next time I come. It is only about an hour's ride from McLeod, further down in the valley so noty as cold or rainy, and the view of the Dhauladaur range is breath taking. Hope the pics I took will do justice, but only had a couple left in my camera. We had a really lovely day there and I look forward to being back there one day in the future. It is completely unspoiled by tourism of any sorts and hopefully will stay that way for some time.
Came back feeling really pleased with the day and looking forward to just relaxing, but the room seems to have become a meeting place in the evening and yesterday was no exception. Shajar came, then Nicolai, and then a new guy named Hans who had regards from Susi (someone we know from before) who he had met in Thailand, and then Abdellah came and finally Tashi came looking for Shajar. Well, we had some interesting conversation, and at some point I ordered food from Ashish (after both Abdellah and Ashish looked at me with the same remark "How can you be hungry after all you ate this afternoon?"
Avik was out all this time by the way, as he goes down a few times a day now to check his singles site! but when he came back, he simply ignored everyone, got undressed and got into bed to read...interesting thing was, everyone also ignored him!...Abdellah and Shajar also ate in the room and at 8:30 everyone left, and off to sleep for me. Avik usually stays up to read until around 11 or later but with my earplugs in I simply drift off with no problem.
This book I've been reading has so many things in it which bring life into focus for me...it is in no way a travel book as advertised. It is quite fascintating and a good read for all...The Snow Leopard...
"The absurdity of a life that may well end before one understands it, does not relieve one of the duty to live it through as honestly and generously as possible"
And with that I will end for today....I also wrote a poem early this morning but will go over it again before sending it off...
Wish I had some more time here but also glad to be getting home. Would still like the opportunity to travel to Rajastan with Abdellah, but home is where I need to be now. Also completely out of money and counting rupees, so all things are conspiring to make sure I get home.
(The name of the poem by the way is HOME...you can read it in my poetry section!)
Love to all,
Jane
"The absurdity of a life that may well end before one understands it, does not relieve one of the duty to live it through as honestly and generously as possible" - The Snow Leopard
Today is Friday and I am feeling just about completely well. My test yesterday came back normal (which I was pretty sure of) and I guess whatever I had was just a virus. I am not completely "myself" but feeling happy and at peace and that is what is important. Avik is getting more difficult with each day...he really has taken a serious dislike to me - it is so obvious by the way he looks at me and replies to my questions - but that is HIS problem and not mine. I see him very little and be as nice as I can when we are together and that's that.
Haven't written in a couple of days again and much to tell, so will begin slowly and see how far I get.
Wednesday, my first day really up and around again, I felt an urgent need to walk in the mountains but did not have the energy to walk UP the mountain. so took a rickshaw up to Dharamkot and then just had to walk ON the mountain instead of UP it. It was quite lovely, except for my encounter with Anil who is still persisiting...but was actually quite understanding of my situation and didin't push the issue beyond a request to requite his undying love for me...another guy who just wants a good lay!
Did I write by the way about Avik's sleep talking? Last night , or close to morning when I was watching the sunrise as I do every day, he called out in his sleep "She's such a bitch" or something close to it. Well, I decided to raise the question of why he thought I was a bitch, and what he thought I'd done so horrible to him to cause him to think I am such a terrible person. Bottom line is, after a long interesting converstaion which he denied having the following day, he admitted that basically he never really liked me at all as a person, and just wanted my body!! He really is a very weird person...Won't dwell on the subject, but it was all quite surreal to say the least. His dislike for me grows from day to day as I've mentioned, and just hope I can make a quick a break as possible with him, but that all depends on how soon I can move all my stuff out of his house.
I know that he is already back ont he internet looking for someone else, and have this feeling that I should be able to warn other women about him, but don't really know how to do it and don't think it would be a very clever idea anyway...I have to just get past it as the channeling said and move forward...other women will have to look out for themsleves and hopefully they will be wiser than I was.
I am now sitting in Trek and Dine in Dharamkot eating a quiet lunch after my walk on the mountain. The place is dead quiet...not even one motorcycle outside...it is so peaceful here...I don't even mind the INdian music in the background...more fitting than the usual Hebrew or rock which is played here usually.
Watching an Indian guy get a haricut right here ont he terrace by a "travelling barber" who then massaged his head for a full 10 minutes with oil and is now working on his hands and arms. Looks absoulutely fantastic. WOW! Now he is doing his feet and legs! Amazing!
On my walks recently, even though short, I've seen tons of butterflies and all kinds of new birds that I've never noticed here. Flying South perhaps? don't know. Maybe some of you might know what they are and tell me....one is small and black with a white diamond marking on its head and a red tail. Quite colorful and beautiful
The other is a large light blue one with black markings and a very very long tail.
I've also received a small job offer to teach reiki in pardes chana when I get back and although certainly not anything I could live from, it is a good starting place and could even continue if I get a regular job...
Funny thing happened today while walking in town which has never happened to me before. I was approached by an elderly monk, not a begger or anything, a monk, who started to ask me for something but had no idea what he was saying "hali" or something. If it had been a beggar, I would just have walked off, but a monk, who knows,,,,maybe something important. When I didn't understand, he grabbedme by the hand (I have NEVER felt any adult with such soft skin on his hand...only babies feel like that...apparently never done anything since very young but be a monk!)...and then I realized he was pulling me over to the closest food shop! What did he want??? You won't believe it! He wanted a package ot tumeric! Which I bought for him for 10 rupees...but this was really funny!
But I had a lovely walk and then walked down back to town, sat at nick's looking at the view I so love with hot apple tea and toast and butter.
Had a nice return to the room and we all just ordered food from Ashish and then Abdellah wanted a movie for the first time in almost 2 weeks. Avik didn't want to join us so we saw They Shoot Horses Don't they...I'd never seen it and it was quite original and very well acted. Enjoyed it.
Yesterday Thursday we got up early, and went with Kokila to her farmhouse. This has got to be one of the most fabulous places I've seen for a real get away from it all vacation. They have this piece of land right on a river, where they have built a house for themselves and containing an additional 5 rooms for guest eachw ith private bath. They have fresh fish fromt he river, free range chickens, organic vegetable garden trees with papaya, mango, banana, guava, nuts...they get fresh grain from the village and grind it themselves in a mill...and when you sit there, the ONLY sound you hear is the sound of the rushing of the waters fo the river over the stones...people buy CD's to get this sound so they can relax or meditate, but here, that is the only sound you hear. It is hypnotically relaxing. Kokila cooked us a wonderful lunch, actually the best meal I've ever eaten in India, and then took abdellah and myself out to see the village and walk around. Avik didn't want to come but preferred to have a drink with her husband and then take a nap. It is a place I can see myself spending a week or even longer in next time I come. It is only about an hour's ride from McLeod, further down in the valley so noty as cold or rainy, and the view of the Dhauladaur range is breath taking. Hope the pics I took will do justice, but only had a couple left in my camera. We had a really lovely day there and I look forward to being back there one day in the future. It is completely unspoiled by tourism of any sorts and hopefully will stay that way for some time.
Came back feeling really pleased with the day and looking forward to just relaxing, but the room seems to have become a meeting place in the evening and yesterday was no exception. Shajar came, then Nicolai, and then a new guy named Hans who had regards from Susi (someone we know from before) who he had met in Thailand, and then Abdellah came and finally Tashi came looking for Shajar. Well, we had some interesting conversation, and at some point I ordered food from Ashish (after both Abdellah and Ashish looked at me with the same remark "How can you be hungry after all you ate this afternoon?"
Avik was out all this time by the way, as he goes down a few times a day now to check his singles site! but when he came back, he simply ignored everyone, got undressed and got into bed to read...interesting thing was, everyone also ignored him!...Abdellah and Shajar also ate in the room and at 8:30 everyone left, and off to sleep for me. Avik usually stays up to read until around 11 or later but with my earplugs in I simply drift off with no problem.
This book I've been reading has so many things in it which bring life into focus for me...it is in no way a travel book as advertised. It is quite fascintating and a good read for all...The Snow Leopard...
"The absurdity of a life that may well end before one understands it, does not relieve one of the duty to live it through as honestly and generously as possible"
And with that I will end for today....I also wrote a poem early this morning but will go over it again before sending it off...
Wish I had some more time here but also glad to be getting home. Would still like the opportunity to travel to Rajastan with Abdellah, but home is where I need to be now. Also completely out of money and counting rupees, so all things are conspiring to make sure I get home.
(The name of the poem by the way is HOME...you can read it in my poetry section!)
Love to all,
Jane
posted by Jane @ 3:53 PM
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